I'm still thinking very much of him.
But, recently, I felt something again.. He is somehow avoiding me in some way...which it tells me that it is time for me to wake up and forget about him.

In the process of waking up myself, sometimes he would do something very close to me, very caring... Maybe it is myself whom is thinking too much, stil somehow hoping for something from it (which I know there won't be anything). He used to say I'm thinking too much - I mistaken the feeling of making "buddy" with him, instead of lovers. But, for what he had done with me, is it a norm for buddies to do so! He is putting me into dilemma again :(

I remind myself many times, so many times that he is just a buddy, a buddy, a buddy, a buddy, .... But, :'(

Tonight, I'm really missing someone so much.. Thinking of him a lot.. It was like every moment, every second, he will cross my mind, and I will just stop by to think of him.

I'm just wondering how long do I have to take to forget the things we had done together? I told him before, how I wish that my brain can work like a computer whereby I can choose whichever file that I would like to delete and hit the 'delete' button and it will delete all memory that have us together..

But, sometimes I would think back, if I would to delete it, then I would forget this man at all! Then, do I really want it that way?